Your unfinished story matters!

unfinshed2

I sat in the Women’s Fellowship waiting for my turn to share what God has been doing in my life, especially during the last four years of challenges. It wasn’t easy to recall everything that has happened in the past and how I managed to face it. Even though the severity of my challenges is now reduced, they are still present. I was actually sharing my testimony from the place of waiting…waiting on God.

Bringing the scars to life again was not possible without being emotionally moved. Words chocked in my throat and my heart was heavy sharing about the goodness of God and His abundant grace on my life. If not by His grace I wouldn’t even be living today; and that is the biggest part of my testimony I could ever share with them.

The trauma was unbearable after the scary diagnosis of my daughter four years ago.Each day had been a  challenge. All I wanted was to get relief from the heartache I was going through. It was unbearable for me to see my child suffer day and night with seizures, vomiting and many other health issues. I was clueless as to what the future would hold for her.

As a mother, I felt helpless; not being able to comfort her in any way. Numerous sleepless nights, hospital visits, blood tests, one after another treatment plans, following my son’s severe speech delay & behaviour issues and most of all the chaos in the family made me to doubt God’s love and even His existence. Why wouldn’t He see my tears? Why wouldn’t He stop this storm? I questioned…

..but at the end of the day, all I could do was hope. Hope for a day when everything would be ok…and this hope was given to me by Him. In the midst of all these hard days, if I could still come to His feet, dive into His Word, trust Him for my future, praise Him for leading me each day, think of pursuing my passion, it was all because of the hope He placed in my heart. He strengthened me when I felt weak, He lifted my soul when I felt all was lost. He held me near Him when I felt bitter and troubled.
“The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18).

As I began to share my life in the women’s meeting in the church, I wondered if my story from my waiting season would make any difference to them. Because I had no miracle to share except the story of my continued faith in God; my perseverance and the hope I clung to in the midst of my challenges. But the things I was hesitant about in my story became the most impacting insights for them. He used my hurts, my tears and my disappointments to bring encouragement to their hearts.

I realised that my testimony is not something about my greatness but His glory alone and how He wants it to be. It doesn’t have to be perfect but true and genuine. It doesn’t have to be a miraculous or glamorous one but hope-filled and real.

Friend, are you in a season of waiting and wondering if your life story would ever be a blessing to others? Do you feel that you haven’t got any miracle to share yet? Do you feel your testimony doesn’t make any sense?

God wants to use your broken places to bring glory to Him. He wants to be glorified in the midst of your waiting season. Your testimony is all about His glory no matter how it looks at present. He wants you to share your life right from the places where you feel broken, discouraged, and hopeless. He wants you to bring comfort to others with the comfort you have received from Him.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.” 2 Corinthians 1:4

 

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Treasure inside

trresure inside

A few days back as my husband and I were  having a talk in our kitchen, he asked me a question.

“Why are you so slow and dull when you are working in the kitchen but energetic when you are working at the laptop?”

He was right in his observation of me and I also admitted that the kitchen is not my thing. Either I work too slow thinking, dreaming & travelling in my thoughts or I do just what is necessary to get the kitchen work done as soon as possible.

To express my feelings in a more elaborative way, I told him a story which I read a few months ago; it really helped me understand why I am the way I am.

The story goes like this:

One day a man caught three fish from a stream. He placed them side by side on the grass. Before he removed them from the water, they were so vibrant, graceful and alive but after he caught them, it was another story.

As the fish lay on the grass, they were motionless. Their eyes had no movements, they panted for air and they looked and acted weird. The man noticed that they seemed unhappy, so he talked to them, hoping that his encouragement would change them.

Still no movement, no response and no change.

The man was sure that the fish would adjust and learn to like the grass. He liked the grass so why shouldn’t they? He thought. But still the fish didn’t blink and they just lay there looking dumber by every second.

Finally a little boy approached shouting, “What are you doing? Put them back! They can’t be all they’ve been created to be when they are out of the water.”

After getting convinced, the man carefully placed each fish back in the stream. As soon as the fish got into the water, they began to swim fluently with their original vibrant energy. The man realized that no matter how long the fish lay there, they would never adjust to the grass. In fact, they would eventually die. Because they weren’t created for grass but for the stream.

I told my husband, “I feel like a fish on the grass doing kitchen things which is not my gifting and thus I can’t give my best here. But when I am writing, creating something, exploring, encouraging others, investing in their lives, seeing my life is being used for Kingdom work then I am more like a fish in the stream.”

I remember, a couple of years back, I felt so inactive, dull, weird and unhappy with my life. No matter how hard I tried to adjust myself with the daily house chores and convincing myself that the role of house wife is the best and fulfilling thing I could ever do, there was something missing. My heart wasn’t coming fully alive when I did these things. I felt incomplete. I just felt the same as the fish on the grass until one day I understood that I was created for a specific purpose apart from the household work I do. My feelings were the real me. There were reasons why I felt and acted this way and why I had this dissatisfaction within me; I was created with those inner desires, potentials, and God’s assignment for my life.

When I allowed myself to unlock my feelings and listen to my inner voice, God helped me to identify the treasure He has given me. The treasure included my potentials, my interests, my personality and my life experiences. Now it was time to use it for His service and glory. Once I was able to use this treasure in all the possible ways I could, I felt like those fish in the stream…vibrant, energetic and alive.

Have you ever felt the same way?

I don’t know which place you are in at present. You might be on the grass feeling motionless, dissatisfied with your life, desiring to be in the place you were created for and holding your passion for something different. You know in your heart that this isn’t the place you are meant to stay, or this isn’t the work that you want to do for the rest of your life. You are created for a specific purpose apart from your daily works and job. Something inside of you makes you restless until you step into that purpose. Your feelings of dissatisfaction, the irresistible desires to do something different and the courage and faith you are building inside are the signs you are here to make a remarkable impact on this generation. Don’t let your feelings die within you.

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10

My encouragement to you is to unlock your inner feelings and desires to identify the treasure God has placed inside you when He created you. He wouldn’t have given you those feelings, potentials, personality and life experiences unless he planned to use them for His glory. Let your life get vibrant, enthusiastic, lively and thriving discovering your very purpose and the treasure inside you. Let your life’s treasure be used for His glory. I pray you discover it and live your life to its fullest.